Darkroom

It would be much easier to watch this bird and cicada soundtrack movie if it weren't for all the bad actors talking during the whole thing. If this review makes no sense, watch and you'll understand.

Waning - Do Not Watch The Trailer before the movie, unless you want to know the killer's identity beforehand!! Darkroom is set at a rural location where a family has gathered and an unknown (assuming you haven't watched the trailer) psycho with a passion for photography is on a brutal killing spree. Until very recently I had never heard of the film, it appears in none of my horror movie books. It was shot in under 2 weeks on a low budget and the acting is pretty amateur. We get the obligatory girl in the shower scene, though little nudity is seen, and whilst there is a sufficient body count the effects are nothing remarkable. Niko Mastorakis, who made the notorious (and bad) Island of Death, is producer and the film does have a part European Giallo look, the unknown glove wearing killer, the darkroom where the killer develops his photographs, etc. The most horrific thing on offer here is the character Steve and his prize winning mullet! I have scored this 5/10, partly down to the fact that I watched it on a really nice Blu-ray release, I love slasher movies and could happily watch them all day long, but your average horror fan may feel short changed by this entry.

I picked up an old and dusty VHS copy of "Darkroom" at a nearby video store that was shutting down, and I actually even hesitated to spend 0,50€ on it. The synopsis and the cover image on the box – same one as illustrated here on the website – made it look like yet another cheap late 80's erotic thriller with a plot like there are thirteen in a dozen and a handful of tame & tedious soft-core sex sequences. I bought the VHS after all and can't say I regret it very much. Of course it is a predictable and largely inept attempt at making a slasher movie, but hey, at least it contains a few interesting elements and it didn't bore me to death. The plot is relatively simple and straightforward. Janet (an amazingly hot 80's babe) and her boyfriend Steve (a imbecilic mullet-guy who desperately wants to look like Patrick Swayze in "Dirty Dancing") are home at the isolated family farm to spend a weekend together. The farm homes Janet's mother, her two sisters, her grandfather and two cousins. Janet's father as well as her aunt and uncle mysteriously died in a fire several years ago. The only neighbors that live close to the family has been butchered by a maniac during the opening sequences of the film and now Janet's youngest sister Paula is missing. When they discover her mutilated body, they know there's a maniac killer amongst them. The climax of the film and the identity of the killer are perhaps too easy to predict, but "Darkroom" compensates the lack of originality through openly hinting at some clichéd taboo- subjects like incest, family feud and voyeurism. As the title suggests, the killer photographs all of his/her victims before, during and after the process of murdering them. The body count is also quite a lot higher than in other contemporary slasher flicks. And, even though most of the actual killing occurs off-screen, the murders and especially the way they are committed are barbaric and deeply unpleasant. Nice bit of trivia for horror fanatics: "Darkroom" was produced by the Greek writer/director Niko Mastorakis; infamous for the insane and widely banned "Island of Death".

Dark Room was produced by Nico Mastorakis who himself has directed a number of underground genre pieces. His credits include Island of death, Edge of terror and the stalk and slash themed thriller Blind Date. This obscure late eighties effort generally keeps its roots in the murder-mystery sub-category that Mastorakis is so fond of working with. It includes enough of the typical clichés to make it one of those slasher/thrillers that were commonplace throughout the decade, although the cover description would lead you to believe that it's ‘a tale of sexual repression and revenge.'(!)

Janet (Jill Pierce) is an attractive teen that's returning home to her family farm after a long stay with her outrageously mulleted boyfriend Steve (Jeffrey Alan Arbaugh). She's picked a bad time to come back, because an unseen someone has just murdered a cheery blonde and her husband with an axe, only a few miles away. The killer watched his victims through a camera before hacking them up and then taking photos of their bloodied corpses as they lay lifeless on the floor. When Janet arrives we get to meet the rest of the Templeton family that consists of a whole heap of likely suspects or would-be-psychopaths. Firstly there's Steve the boyfriend (mullet), who's a professional photographer by trade and makes strange disappearances every time someone gets killed. Mark (Allen Leiberman) is Janet's cousin who apparently ‘… wanders of all the time and disappears for hours on end.' His brother Perry (Aarin Teich) seems a little mysterious and likes to keep quiet. Paula's (Abigail Lenz) apparently gone missing, whilst her boyfriend George (Timothy Hicks) ‘was always a little on the wild side.' Grandpa (John O' Connor) takes an incriminating runner every time the Sheriff stops to talk to him, and their mother Nora (Stella Kastner) seems to be a little too tense for my liking! Cindy (Sara Lee Wade) is the cute and cheeky blonde younger sister that's hardly mass-murderer material but says, very saucily, that she would ‘… like to help Steve find his fishing pole!' Hmmm, sounds like trouble! After they all share dinner, Janet takes a shower (well someone would have to) stripping completely naked with only a thin window net to cover her modesty. With timing that train passengers would kill for, up pops the psycho photographer, brashly leaning a ladder against the porch so he can climb up and get some snaps of the soap splashed teen in all her glory. He then proceeds to get in the house and open her suitcase, before playing touchy-feely with her underwear (luckily he refrained from sniffing them!) The next day, relatives' start getting murdered by the mystery cameraman who seems to have his eyes (or lenses) on Janet, which means that she must be the true object of his insanity…

Dark Room is one of the ever-increasing numbers of yawn-inducing whodunits that have very little - if anything – to redeem taking the time to watch them. The basic problem is that Terrence O'Hara has spent so much time trying to make an intriguing mystery that he's forgotten the fundamental elements that are necessary to make a good film - Structure and pace, and this doesn't have either. The puzzle may have rated this higher if the killer wasn't clearly shown on the front cover, which pretty much ruins any point in seeing this at all. Woeful amateur porn-star acting didn't help matters and the only character with any charisma was the charming little Cindy. Her cheeky flirtatious persona was rather appealing, she was at least a lot better than the bimbo left to battle the killer who lacked any allurement whatsoever.

You've got more chance of seeing Jill Pierce win an Oscar than you have of finding any gore or suspense in this rubbish. Most murders are committed off screen and on occasion you'll see a shot of the corpses splashed in blood after the deed has been done. (Wow!) The movie could have ended quite satisfactorily at the sixty-minute mark but instead it drags on for another twenty-two, which was not only unnecessary, but it was also extremely unpleasant. At least the pathetic script managed to spawn the odd inadvertent giggle by its outright stupidity. The movie is rife with dialogue like `I don't trust air that I can't see' (what?), but even so, it's hardly worth paying for.

The fact that this is an obscurity from the eighties will invite most completists to hunt it down for nothing but the fact that it's rare. But be warned it really doesn't warrant a purchase when the murders are so lackadaisical and the dramatics are simply horrid. It's not even really a teen-kill movie; it's more thriller than Halloween inspired hack and slasher. It's not only really bad, but it's also painfully boring, so I really recommend that you give it a miss. Try one of Mastorakis' better efforts instead.

My review was written in July 1990 after watching the movie on Quest Entertainment video cassette.

Slasher film "Darkroom" starts well but sputters once the killer's identity has been revealed midstream. Direct-to-video feature is merely okay for target fans.

Best thing here is the opening credits sequence, imaginatively using frames of film to display the title cards as if magnified.

Film proper has a maniacal killer preying on victims in a family setting and taking photographs of same. Incest is the key plot gimmick as a childhood trauma solves the mystery.

As long as the characters and suspects are introduced in opening reels and the killer is confined to stalking footage, the film holds up, but once the cat's out of the bag it becomes boring. Finale has two characters thought to be dead bouncing back for a hokey fight.

No-name cast is game.