Making of a Male Model

This one's got it all -- silly premise, idealized show business plot line, cliche-ridden script, pseudo-Bacharach score, hunks in their underwear, limp-wristed stereotype homosexuals, and -- perhaps best of all -- Joan Collins.

The first time you see it, you may not be able to revel fully in its tackiness. I suggest three or four viewings, especially when you're feeling sick or vulnerable, for it to have its full effect.

Orchids, orchids!

Here's proof that the term "Cougar" wasn't invented to mean what it does now, back in 1983 when Joan Collins, famously considered the iconic DYNASTY Cougar i.e. seducer of younger men, describes how she sees Jon-Erik Hexum's would-be model, who she had talked into going from a manly Texas stuntman to a New York model: "A cougar," she describes, "ready to pounce."

And also dated is when Hexum's Tyler Burnett complains about gay men when Collins, as successful agent Kay Dillon, points out that it goes with the show-biz territory: one that Hexum is able to realistically combat, and with enough reluctance to not seem awkward that such a perfect-looking guy wouldn't have considered modelling in the first place...

So the best scenes occur as he learns the ropes and begins to climb the fashion rungs, leaning on Jeff Conaway's gay, has-been roommate for Shakespearean-delivered advice while hitting auditions and strategic disco nightspots.

But it fails with another hard if impossible device to grasp (or recover from): That Hexum, star of the series VOYAGERS and soon cast in COVER-UP (before his famous accidental death), would fall so pathetically hard for Joan: The rest of the Movie-of-the-Week melts into a sappy Lifestyle Channel romance, in reverse...

Here it's a dude that... despite quickly hitting it off with gorgeous girl-next-door Tamara Stafford, the next year's scream queen in THE HILLS HAVE EYES PART II... trades sappy, love-crushed seats in a role usually written for the ingenue...

"Turned around," Joan says, "with an accent on you men," and in that, would have given the actress an interesting performance rather than Joan simply floating down river while Hexum, by wielding his laidback, humble persona, keeps from drowning in it.

I was really lucky and found this movie in VHS format on Jon-Erik Hexum's fansite. I always liked this movie for it's pure cheesiness. There are better made-for-tv movies out there, but this one has it's own brand of charm. It starts off with Joan Collins playing the owner of a successful modelling agency in search of a new hunk to represent. Jon-Erik Hexum plays a farmhand who is transformed into the '80s hottest male model with the help of a "Fever" aftershave contract. There's a lot of sexual innuendo throughout this movie which makes it funny, and Joan Collins is stellar in her role, as usual. If you want to see an early'80s made-for-tv movie at it's finest, this one is a great choice!

What makes this movie stand out (besides the sad fact that its young star would soon be gone) is that it viewed the cut-throat world of modeling from the perspective of a male rather than female model, showing that in this game there's equality: both sexes are used, exploited, taken advantage of, and made to feel like a commodity rather than a person.

The (much too soon to be) late Jon Eric Hexum does a great job as a young man who finds himself a modeling success almost overnight only to find it wasn't nearly as great as he thought it would be. Joan Collins, at the height of her "Dynasty" fame, was perfect for the role as the agency owner who becomes his lover (today she'd get arrested), then makes a sacrifice to save him from going down the wrong path. Jeff Conaway is also good as an aging model who tries to turn back the clock and gets caught by the hands of time.

Too bad someone can't go back in time and tell Jon not to play Russian Roulette!

Still oozing sex appeal, fiftysomething "Dynasty" star Joan Collins (as Kay Dillon) discovers dramatically handsome young Jon-Erik Hexum (as Tyler Burnett) working on a ranch in Nevada. Before you can say, "Howdy cowboy, where's your horse?" Ms. Collins offers to take the muscular hunk to New York City, where she'll make Mr. Hexum the star of her modeling agency. At first, Hexum is a hard sell, resisting the "weirdoes and queers". But eventually, he gets plucked and… well, you get the idea.

Classic TV-movie tailored trash. Don't miss the credit: "film editor, Dick Darling". Hexum, Collins, and "Dynasty" followers will be pleased. Collins accurately describes Hexum: "He's got that natural raw sex look." You'll also get to hear photographer Arte Johnson demand, "Take off your shirt I want to see you body," and Kevin McCarthy informs, "You're paid to show off your pectorals and your tight butt." The other photographers, including Robert Walker Jr., are, likewise, a scream.

Unbeknownst to everyone, Jeff Conaway (as Chuck Lanyard) steals away with the movie, playing a decadent male model hitting the skids. Try to imagine enjoying "Making of a Male Model" (as a story) without Mr. Conway's presence. There are more shirtless scenes of Hexum than you can shake a stick at; but, Conway's scenes give Hexum some room to act. Unfortunately, Hexum accidentally shot himself to death, on the set of his "Cover Up" series, in 1984.

****** Making of a Male Model (10/9/83) Irving J. Moore ~ Jon-Erik Hexum, Joan Collins, Jeff Conaway