After School

Steer clear of this film, it was just a bad idea all away around. Sam Bottoms performance is laughable, he chews up dialogue more than the Cookie Monster. The story (or lack of) deteriorates into a fantasy film in which several characters go back to prehistoric time. Then its time to add some Playboy Playmates (the terrible "actress" Sherrie Rose for example) for mere eye candy. Just a dud overall.

I thought this was supposed to be of those raunchy 80s comedies but it's not what I expected. I was thinking its a movie like Porkey's or that direction. Pretty dull and boring and with the before time scenes it felt like there's 2 movies going on.

Based on the cover, it looks like some 80s summer fun comedy flick with babes in bikinis, everyone in sun glasses, boom boxes on shoulders, a geeky side-kick...you get the picture. But it's not really any of those things. More than anything though, it's not a comedy. It's just this weird drama that revolves around a priest who's realizing he may be missing out on the good things in life. Meaning he's finally grown into his good looks and the hot babe of the college is all up on him.

The story is pretty much that simple. Does Father Mac keep it in his robes or does he invite her into the confessional for some extra praying? After School was a weird one. It doesn't do anything really that well. There aren't many scenes of humor, that are intentional anyways. The acting is pretty average all the way around, with all characters being kinda bland. The flick keeps you entertained solely on the end goal. Does the priest succumb to his animal desires? And the other big reason you keep watching is for those weirdass prehistoric scenes. There's just these flashbacks to prehistoric times that, I think, just show the current dilemma in a more symbolic and animalistic fashion. Pretty weird and kinda stupid, but at the same time, all the cave women in the prehistoric times were naked, and some were smoking hot. So you get a decent amount of nudity in this one, which is always a plus.

It's overall a pretty average flick, but with the nudity and the surprisingly interesting story, you're kept watching. If you find the priest/sex issue to be an intriguing issue, and if you like super silly 80s fashion, and a plethora of boobs, I'd say give this a shot.

As a viewing experience, "After School" isn't so much bizarre as inexplicable.

Sure, it's a fairly run-of-the-mill drama about a relationship between a priest and a college girl that threatens to become romantic, and this culminates with an actually fairly pointless debate the priest has with an atheist on the "Dick Cavett show" - with Cavett playing himself.

What's inexplicable is that throughout this tale, scenes of prehistoric people are intercut. Why? What was the point of that? I do not believe that these scenes really tell a story of their own. Why were they included?

It is true that for a brief second, the characters discuss evolution. Does that justify making half the movie "Quest for Fire-lite"?

Of course, the prehistoric people are all almost naked, and played by obvious models chosen for their looks. So it does add nudity. But couldn't they have worked some of that in, in the present day? You know, like every other movie with topless actresses? Why did they have to go back in time just to show some skin?

This is one of the most perplexing filmmaking decisions I have ever witnessed the result of.

My review was written in February 1989 after watching the movie on Academy video cassette.

Intriguing but disappointing, "After School" attempts to mix exploitation elements with the traditional morality tale. Pic received a modest regional release last year ahead of video.

Format of present-day moral crisis mirrored by intercutting with primitive man's behaviour thousands of years ago is a throwback to silent cinema, especially the work of Cecil B. DeMille. Confusion of content is reflected in pic's title changes, ranging from "Before God" and "Return to Eden" to distributor's racier "Private Tutor" and finally "After School".

Sam Bottoms toplines as a young priest teaching at St. Joseph's Catholic College in Florida who is selected to defend the faith on the Dick Cavett tv talk show against ex-priest Robert Lansing's book "Before God", which claims man created God in his own image.

While prepping for the debate, Bottoms falls in love with beautiful student Renee Coleman, whose own perceptive classroom questioning of church dogma adds to his doubts and ultimately forces Bottoms to go his own way, leaving Lansing victorious.

Pic's use of primitive man footage is a bit suspect, since it includes lots of topless scenes of beautiful cavewomen Alison Woodward, Jacqueline Rodriguez and Catherine Williams that are extraneous to the main action. Director William Olsen managed to juggle the commercial realities of exploitation filmmaking and thoughtful themes far more convincingly in his 1983 feature "Getting It On".

Bottoms is earnest in an old-fashioned style and the film drags on repetitively rather than developing its religious ideas. Coleman as his love interest is a fresh new actress worth watching (also seen to good effect as the kidnapped beauty in the recent release "Who's Harry Crumb?").

Tech credits are fine, with colorful lensing in the Orlando, Florida area.