The Angry Red Planet

I saw this movie in the theater when I was 5 years old and it stayed in my memory all these years. By today's standards it comes up short, but I've seen movies with hundreds of times the budget that were a lot worse. Sure the acting is bad, but anything John Wayne did before 1939 could not be called good acting either. This movie does have some positives working for it. The female among the 4 astronauts is a biologist/zoologist and is not just window-dressing. The martian monsters and landscape/city are imaginative. They had some kind of 1g drive that allowed their rather capacious spacecraft to not need zero gravity effects, although they could have showed the turnover at the halfway point. All in all this is not the stinker some other viewers have labeled it. My score 6/10.

This movie is funny and painful at the same time. The "Cinemagic" almost gave me a seizure. Despite what they imply, "Cinemagic" is not some innovative technical procedure. It was "developed" as the result of an accident, and they used it because it disguised the fact that their "monsters" were so stupid-looking. I also don't think it's a coincidence that the writer is Sid "Pink".

This movie is good for a laugh, if you are really looking for a movie made in 9 days on 200,000 dollars. It is entertaining; at least I can say that about it. The bat/rat/spider is the highlight.

(edit 12/2021) I wrote this first review 20 years ago, and forgot about it until I saw the movie again, today! Well, I have to update my rating, because it's not really as bad as I thought back then. It still has entertainment value, which is better than plenty of movies I've seen.

How come there are so many negative reviews about this one? It actually holds up better than many other sci-fi films of that period (wasn't "Teenagers From Outer Space" also made in 1959?), and if it's clunky at times, its clunkiness is part of its innocent charm. The effects and the matte drawings may not be perfect, but they're sure colorful and entertaining, and the movie's restrained approach (at least more restrained that the title indicates) is most welcome. The presence of a woman scientist is also worth noting; although her treatment by the ship's captain is often sexist, ultimately she proves to be quite intelligent and competent. (**1/2)

First off, I'd like to say that the user comments alone left me with tears in my eyes from laughing. One comment that bad SF movies become good comedies is right on the mark. MST3000 made it's living off that.

If you look at THE ANGRY RED PLANET as the fever dream of a 10 year old comic book reader from 1959, you'll have the handle on this sucker. All the elements are there: the pseudoscience, occasionally logical, more often hilariously infantile. The adolescent boy attitude toward sex, with the "gigolo" captain (good call on that one, guys!) making eyes at the buxom "scientist" with hair so red it's a wonder it doesn't set off the fire alarms. The ridiculous conception of Mars as a planet so alien that everything glows red, yet one alien monster has a mouse face, and the blob alien has an eye that rotates like a kid's toy. The comic relief, an overweight astronaut (!) who sounds like he never finished the 8th grade in Brooklyn and has a psychotic fixation on his ray gun. And of course, the mere fact that alien = dangerously evil. If these people had met E.T., they would have roasted him in two seconds flat! "OW" indeed!

Don't get me wrong. I rated this movie low. Still, it's never boring (except when the scientist tries to explain everything - only to make it all sound more and more ridiculous), and you have to admit, in your little kid core, it makes you jump a few times.

Okay, then don't admit it. I guess you were never 10.

...no kidding!

Take every hackneyed gimmick you've ever seen in bad science fiction movies, add in bad acting, cornball dialogue, extraordinarily amateurish special effects, silly 'Martians', and add a garish crimson filter for your 'Martian landscape' shots, and you have a monster of a movie like this one turned out to be.

On the other hand, the monster ameba with the rotating eyeball was fun to watch, as was the gigantic rat-bat-spider creature.

This was made in those grand old days before 'political correctness' was so common; the Astronauts waste no time in wasting the local flora and fauna whenever they get the chance. Hey, why conduct a serious scientific expedition when you can romp around roasting the locals?

All its faults aside (and there are many of them), this is a fun movie to watch, particularly if you enjoy screaming in delight at all the bizarre events depicted on the screen.

Go ahead and rent this one, just make sure no one sees you with the evidence.