Vampire vs. Vampire

Lam Ching Ying plays yet another Taoist priest (this time with a monobrow) in yet another Chinese vampire film. There's the expected hopping vampire in the form of a little kid who chirps like a chick, but this one also chucks in a whole load of other supernatural nonsense, including a female palm tree ghost, evil bats that terrorise some nuns, the spirit of a dead woman who possesses the priest's apprentices, and a Western Dracula-style bloodsucker who is revived by a stupid army captain. All of this is presented in such a chaotic fashion that it proves hard to follow. And if, like me, you struggle with Chinese comedy, the film's constant silly humour goes to make this even more of a chore to sit through.

From the opening scene in which a toothy, slimy monster oozes from a jar, to the ending in which two frogs with glowing Chinese symbols on their skin hop out of some quicksand, I was totally perplexed and not very amused.

3/10. Watch Mr. Vampire instead.