Kevin Costner credited as playing...
Roy McAvoy
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Well, I tend to think of the golf swing as a poem.
- Clint: Ooh, he's doing that poetry thing again.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: The critical opening phrase of this poem will always be the grip. Which the hands unite to form a single unit by the simple overlap of the little finger. Lowly and slowly the clubhead is led back. Pulled into position not by the hands, but by the body which turns away from the target shifting weight to the right side without shifting balance. Tempo is everything; perfection unobtainable as the body coils down at the top of the swing. Theres a slight hesitation. A little nod to the gods.
- Dr. Molly Griswold: A, a nod to the gods?
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Yeah, to the gods. That he is fallible. That perfection is unobtainable. And now the weight begins shifting back to the left pulled by the powers inside the earth. It's alive, this swing! A living sculpture and down through contact, always down, striking the ball crisply, with character. A tuning fork goes off in your heart and your balls. Such a pure feeling is the well-struck golf shot. Now the follow through to finish. Always on line. The reverse C of the Golden Bear! The steel workers' power and brawn of Carl Sandburg's. Arnold Palmer!
- Romeo Posar: Unnhh, he's doing the Arnold Palmer thing.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: End the unfinished symphony of Roy McAvoy.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: If I had it to do all over again, I'd still hit that shot.
- Romeo: Man, you'd bury yourself alive just to prove you could handle the shovel.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: [Explaining the golf shot he made as David's caddy] When a defining moment comes along you define the moment or the moment defines you.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: You know why I still hit that shot?
- Romeo Posar: Yeah, because it's the only way you could beat Dave Simms.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: No.
- Romeo Posar: 'Cause it was that look in your face...
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: I hit it again because that shot was a defining moment, and when a defining moment comes along, you define the moment... or the moment defines you.
- [Asking Romeo to be his caddy again instead of Earl]
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Look, I love Earl, okay, but... I need you.
- Romeo Posar: You don't love me?
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Yeah, yeah, I-I love you too, goddammit.
- Romeo Posar: Well, as much as Earl?
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: I don't know! I mean, when I was with Earl, I was thinking of you... Yes, uh, as much as Earl. More than Earl. More than Earl.
- Romeo Posar: Am I special?
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Well, if you can remove the sexual overtones and add a golf theme, then Romeo, I am your Juliet.
- [Roy tried to sneak into Molly's office the back way]
- Dr. Molly Griswold: Roy, Roy... why are you here?
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Therapy.
- Dr. Molly Griswold: You've come for therapy? Okay, look, Roy, you know, you really need to make an appointment. Because I have a client in a half an hour.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: That's enough time. Thirty minutes? Hell, I'm not THAT fucked up.
- [Roy wants to bet his car, but Boone isn't interested]
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: That's because you think of it as transportation, Boone. Think of it as bragging rights. Think of yourself sitting around the bar, crowing to your cronies about the Cadillac you won from me. They'll forget all about the Winnebago you lost to me.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: [At the first tee in the first round of the U.S. Open] I got time for a quick bucket?
- US Open Starter: Tee it up.
- Romeo: Man, it took awhile to get you off the floor this morning, hoss. And may I say you don't handle the hooch like you used to.
- [looking down the fairway]
- Romeo: Oh yeah, I saw this hole on TV. Just hit the big dog the hell up the chute.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: No, I've learned my lesson. Just going to play it safe, smart, conservative, fairways and greens.Give me the 2-Iron.
- Romeo: Are you sure?
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Yeah.
- [takes the 2-Iron and hits his drive]
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Be humble, be humble.
- Romeo: [after the round is over] 83. Well, you're humble now, holmes.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: I was hungover.
- Romeo: Well... that may have been a coaching error on my part.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Yeah, I think maybe it was. Thanks, amigo.
- [In preparation to shoot over the water hazard at hole 18 at the US Open]
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: This is for Venturi who thinks I should lay up.
- Romeo: What does he know? He only won this tournament before you were born.
- Romeo Posar: Well, David Simms may be a "soulless robot", but he's a rich, happy, soulless robot... with a beautiful doctor lady girlfried. Besides, how's getting in the Open going to change what she thinks about you?
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Well, it'll show her that I'm not who she thinks I am.
- Romeo Posar: But you are who she thinks you are!
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Okay, so how do I do it? Therapy, I mean, I mean, wh - how do I start doing it?
- Dr. Molly Griswold: Ooo-kay, Roy. Well, in parlance you might understand, just kick back and let the big dog eat.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Suppose there's this guy, and he's standing on the shore of a big wide river, and the... river's full of all manner of disaster, you know, piranhas, alligators, eddies, currents, shit like that... nobody'll even go down there to dip a toe. And on the other side of the river's a million bucks, and on this side of the river... is a rowboat.
- Dr. Molly Griswold: Mm-hmm?
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: I guess my question's this: What would possess the guy standing on the shore to swim for it?
- Dr. Molly Griswold: He is an idiot.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: No, see, he's a helluva swimmer. His problem's more like why does he always have to... rise to the challenge?
- Dr. Molly Griswold: He is a juvenile idiot.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: You don't understand what I mean by the river.
- Dr. Molly Griswold: Roy, we're talking about you, and what you like to call your inner demons - that human frailty you like to blather about - not some mythopoetic metaphor you come up with in a... feeble and transparent effort to do yourself credit.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: You mean you're going to make me feel lousy?
- Dr. Molly Griswold: No.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: I came here to feel better. I mean, what kind of therapy is...
- Dr. Molly Griswold: Roy, Roy, Roy, you don't have any inner demons. What you have is inner crapola, inner debris... garbage... loose wires, a few...
- [laughs]
- Dr. Molly Griswold: horseshit in staggering amounts.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Keep shooting pars, asshole!
- Dave Simms: I'll take 18 of them, all day long!
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Do it and I'll own you.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: You don't think I can knock it on from there?
- Commentator: Let's just say it's a low-percentage shot.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Well, so am I! I mean, look at me, all right, what I'm wearing. I mean, I'm playing for Rio Grande Short-Haul Trucking, Briggs and Brown Sanitation, First State Bank of Salome, Woody's Smokehouse... You think a... you think a guy like me bothers to worry about the percentages?
- Dr. Molly Griswold: [after hitting a terrible shot on the driving range] Oh... fuck!
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Well, you talk like a golfer. Here, try again.
- Dr. Molly Griswold: [Molly hits another terrible shot] Shit!
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: "Fuck." "Shit." These are highly technical golf terms and you're using them on your first lesson. This is promising.
- Dr. Molly Griswold: All you have to do is walk up to this, this woman, wherever she is, look her in the eye - look at me, Roy - just look her in the eyes, that's right, let down your guard, and don't try to be cool or smooth or whatever; just be honest and take a risk. And you know what, whatever happens, if you act from the heart, you can't make a mistake.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Dr. Griswold...
- Dr. Molly Griswold: Yes?
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: I think I'm in love with you.
- Dr. Molly Griswold: What?
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: From the moment I first saw you, I knew I was through with bar girls and... strippers and motorcycle chicks, and... when we first started talking I was smitten with you, and I'm smitten with you more every day I think about you, and the fact that you know I'm full of crapola only makes you more attractive to me. Usually I can bullshit people, but I can't bullshit you, and in addition you got, you got great legs, and... most women I'm thinking about how to get in their pants from day one, but with you I'm just... I'm just thinking about how to get in your heart, and...
- Dr. Molly Griswold: There's no such thing as semi-platonic.
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Well there ought to be.
- Dr. Molly Griswold: I'm a, like, terrible shrink, probably. I should have never gotten out of real estate, shit, actually, I should have never left Ohio for that cowboy in Amarillo, but... Have you ever been to Amarillo?
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Cowboy?
- Dr. Molly Griswold: Yeah. It's not as romantic when you're actually with one, trust me.
- [after Simms refuses to attempt a 250 yard shot over a water hazard]
- Roy 'Tin Cup' McAvoy: Fifteen years on the tour an' you're still a fuckin' pussy.
- Dave Simms: Thirteen years on the driving range and you still think this game is about your testosterone count.