Lucy Lawless credited as playing...
Madame Vandersexxx
- Madame Vandersexxx: [Screams] On, on, VANDERSEXXX!
- [the sexy ladies leave while the room is transformed into a BDSM lair and Madame is revealed as a domanitrix]
- Madame Vandersexxx: Hans, Gruber!
- [Hans and Gruber, Madame's goons, step into the room]
- Cooper: [nervously] Hi. So, are the girls coming back?
- Madame Vandersexxx: Administer the testicle clamps!
- Cooper: [grows fearful; Cooper's jeans are ripped off] Huh? What? Hey!
- [the boys prepare to torture Cooper as Madame smiles and watches]
- Cooper: [panics as he pulls out the paper with the "safe word", but mispronounces it] Safe word! What is that? That's not a word! That's a - "Fluggen-kliggin-kien"?
- Madame Vandersexxx: Welcome to Club Vandersexxx, Amsterdam's most erotic club. Where your every fantasy will be fulfilled.
- Cooper: Also, says I get a free t-shirt with the flyer.
- Madame Vandersexxx: He is American. How sad for you to grow up in a country that was founded by prudes. A country over run with crime and illiteracy. A country where a man is forced to make sex to only one woman at a time and one must learn the woman's name beforehand.
- Cooper: It was horrible.
- Madame Vandersexxx: I know, but you can come with me and let the Vandersexxx begin.