Ring of Darkness

A good David Decoteau movie is one of two things. (1) a good-enough B-movie horror, with lots of blood, lots of cheezy acting, etc. (i.e. "Puppet Master 2") OR (2) Hot guys running around in their boxer briefs held together by some plot that could vaguely be described as a horror movie (i.e. "Voodoo Academy").

A great David Decoteau movie is both (i.e. "the Frightening", "the Brotherhood").

"Ring of Darkness" is neither. Not enough blood, not enough horror, way too much bad music (even by boy-band standards), and the guys BARELY take their shirts off. And I haven't even mentioned the STUPID ending, the awful foley mixing, the D-grade acting, etc etc etc.

I waited over a year for this?

I watched a total of 45 minutes of this movie before I gave up and turned it off. This movie of course was made to bring in the female and a select group of male people. Just the group alone on the stage groping themselves and I don't know how many times I saw one of the guys lift up their shirts to show everyone that they all had six pack tummy's. After the 10th time one of the guys did that - that was enough for me.

And then the audition to replace the gone lead singer. All of the guys auditioning - sounded the same. They all didn't do anything different in the dancing department - with the exception of pointing of the fingers to the audience and of course - lifting up their shirts to show off their six pack.

It's on cable - maybe I will watch the rest of the movie sometime this month - but if I don't - trust me - I won't miss it.

The only good thing about this movie was maybe - John Wynne. Cute Guy.

Yep, almost all the boys hate the Backstreet Boys, so did a man direct this movie? This movie was a drag and cheaply made. I got bored to tears, and I didn't even know why I was watching it. I could change to another channel, but I just stood there like a mindless zombie. Why couldn't I just change the dang channel and not wait till the end? It would have saved my life! Well, I hate this movie. Zombies as horrible singers? Plus, some of the auditioned people who made it sang the same, so that was cheap. Horrible lyrics, dreadful singing, can I take anymore of that? This movie was bad.

Don't watch it. You'll die from boredness and stupidness of the movie.

Ring Of Darkness is about a boy band with a supernatural secret. Apparently, they like to kill and eat their victim's blood. Are they vampires or what? I do not know because the movie never fully explains what they are. I do know that this movie was sub-par in every way to other movies in it's genre.

The band's lead singer finds out their secret, or suddenly has a problem with it- again, not explained. I only know he is going to reveal the secret to the world. The band can't have that and they kill him. They tell the press the pressure got to him and he is now in the hospital. In the meantime, they need a new lead singer so they have tryouts.

"It's all about the voice", says one of the band members, but then each of the contestants lip syncs the entire song. Pretty laughable. Once they get their final 3 contestants, it's off to a secluded mansion where they can make their final pick. The only problem is, they're slowly disappearing.

This movie was pretty bad, even by "B" Movie horror standards. Whoever was in charge of special effects should be banned from the industry forever. There was more horror in the acting than in the actual movie. Particularly by Ryan Starr. She is definitely not gifted in this department. There was a cool little twist at the end, which is what bumped it up to 2 stars for me but other than that, there is little more to this movie. 85 minutes of wasted time. Coltin Scott was probably the best actor in the movie, but seriously, that is not saying much. My recommendation is avoid. If you want some good "B" Movie horror, try Monster Man.

So bad it's goood! (And I'm a straight hetero female!) You gotta believe... 1) A potential boy band member is a budding astrophysicist and Yale student. 2) Another boy-band candidate is an investigative journalist. 3) A cheap, child sized guitar is "A vintage Fender".

All of the above good for lots of laughs. Likewise, the too precious, over-done hairdos and carefully distressed t-shirts.

The plot was sort of plausible and the screen-play had some bite, a few very funny side comments. Blonde bimbo was funny!

I've covered the good-bad. Now the bad-bad.

Ryan Starr. So unappealing on American Idol because she seemed to think she was soo hot. She is absolutely ineffective on screen. Clamp your hand over your mouth and nose, and try to talk in a high pitched screech. That will give you an idea of her speaking voice. ANY third rate starlet would have been better, and would have made the film acceptable, rather than a guilty pleasure.

Stage for the audition looked crappy. Signage too. Couldn't they have ironed the tablecloth?

Very good use of the few locations. Great boy-band parody. Eric Dearborn as Max, and Jeff Peterson as Jonah came off quite well. Loved Joshua Jackson's snarky, faux sincere performance too!

Well directed. Even tho' it was dopey, the film moved fast. Except when Ryan Starr dragged it down.