The Ten

There's a cartoon rhino in this film who lays big stinkin turds everywhere. That's a good description of this movie.

There was an Exodus from the theater starting about halfway through.

It's just a loose collection of sketches that have original concepts -- but like an SNL sketch, they just keep pounding the same joke in over and over into boredom.

Forget about the Ten Commandments -- it's really not about them or religion -- or anything much. There's no satire even.

If you think "oh I love dirty comedies" -- you'll be disappointed. There's no naked breasts. Just a lot of fairly unattractive naked men and endless ass-raping mentions.

I like "dirty and brilliant", but "dirty and lame" is a sin against comedy.

Meaning this movie would get about a two.

I saw this at a matinée in a West Hollywood theater. There were maybe two dozen other people in the theater. One guy laughed. At everything. I think he even snickered at the stone tablets. Other than that, mostly dead silence throughout the entire movie.

The film simply wasn't funny and in some cases, it was virtually offensive. Making a joke out of anal rape isn't easy, as the movie makers proved here. The question is, why did they try? When is rape a suitable topic for comedy? Of course, maybe I am being closed minded and what we really need to do is take the stigma off rape.

The movie makers here seem to think they're some modern incarnation of Mel Brooks or Woody Allen with their abilities to satirize human foibles. Sorry, but they just don't measure up.

Great cast, but it was all sizzle and no steak, meaning most of them had little to do except trade on their celebrity. "Look at me, I'm a big star, but I can get silly in some quirky little movie."

The whole thing had "acting class exercise" written all over it,

(Mild Spoilers)

Okay, David Wain's "The Ten" isn't attempting to redefine the genre of sketch comedy or satire, nor does it pass judgement on the religious iconography it uses as a template. It merely cheekily plays with the idea of the commandments in a smutty and more often than not, unique way. What I think the strongest part of this film is, is its pre-occupation with the perverse and how one can play that out on screen. The repetition of the Spanish word for vagina, Winona Ryder's hysterical relationship with that dummy, Oliver Platt's "Arnie" impression, Liev Schreiber's cat scan machines and the untimely death of hundreds of children, are all irreverent and interesting approaches to the lessons or moral codes of the ten commandments. Whilst some are better executed than others, I particularly appreciated the astute connection between the "Adultery" segment and Woody Allen's films. The use of the stamp jazz soundtrack as the camera moves down a busy New York street, the inclusion of Dianne Weist as a needy wife, and the self-indulgence of our two infidels all really hit the mark. Even their dialogue seems to be mocking Allen's neurotic adulterous characters. Which, as a Woody Allen fan, I really got into.

If for anything else, one should give "The Ten" a go for its wonderful utilisation of well- known actors for comedy. They seem to really be holding absolutely nothing back, and that is actually a thrilling experience to watch. Particularly the work of Winona Ryder, whose drive off into the sunset with no hands on her steering wheel, crying and laughing like a lunatic whilst sitting next to her lover, a wooden dummy, got me so giggly I couldn't breathe.

This film had a good premise with a load of good actors. How did it not come out great? I believe this film just entered into the "Envy" status.

Don't get me wrong there a few laughs (see Liev Screiber's phone call) But no where near enough to cover the patchy and downright stupid storyline. Why was Paul Rudd's story taking place in the TV studio in which he was filming a program? Surely thats not allowed.

This film lacks smarts and doesn't make up for it with all out laughs. The film could of been the next Anchorman or even Dodgeball but due to story getting lost somewhere and a couple of stories which were just stupid (see last story and story with the rhino) I think what sums this film up is the last scene you'll know what I'm talking about when you see it.

I had high expectations and was let down, thoroughly.

Greetings again from the darkness. If you are familiar with "Wet Hot American Summer", Stella Shorts and MTV's "The State", you will have some idea what director David Wain has in store for you. Still, given the talent involved, I was amazed at the lack of creativity involved in most of the 10 vignettes loosely based on the Ten Commandments.

Even the best ideas fall flat and leave us with only a couple of chuckles. Adam Brody being implanted in the ground after a skydive, Winona Ryder shacking up with a wooden marionette, a doctor's goof that leads to his prison "romances", twin brothers learning of their odd gene pool while embracing Oliver Platt's Ah-nuld impersonation, a perky Jessica Alba, Liev Schreiber's attempts to keep up with the Jones', and Justin Theroux as Jesus H. Christ all had potential for true insight into human nature. Instead we are force fed a few quick hits in the "Reno 911" mold.

The ongoing between commandment scenes with Paul Rudd and Famke Jansson could have been classic, and a few scenes with Gretchen Mol will usually save a film. I appreciate the concept but am saddened by the result.