One-Eyed Monster, the story of a blood-thirsty penis on the rampage. If you're reading this blurb of a review, you've most likely seen other flicks that are like One-Eyed Monster. You may have seen Teeth, Bad Biology or maybe even Killer Pussy, so you're probably pretty psyched to check out another flick with deranged genitals. And if you really enjoyed any of the above films, you should definitely give this film a look. If you didn't like them, there's no reason for you to watch this one. It's just more of the same goofy genital humor.
A blazing meteorite/beam of energy type thing crashed into Ron Jeremy as he was star-gazing at the night sky. Not long after, the new found home of the alien entity is now on the loose (it detached itself) and on the rampage. Throw in some forgettable characters and situations, and you got One-Eye Monster. It's basically just a slasher film with a killer penis on the loose.
There's not much to be really impressed with in this flick. The humor is okay, with maybe a few smiles or giggles throughout. Though, I do have to admit the jokes, although pretty weak, are delivered with charm and it's obvious all actors involved are pretty into the film. Well besides Mr. Napier. His character was either hit or miss. His long story, telling his bizarre memory of Vietnam was a total snooze. The black dude was like a bad soap opera star, and brought a forgettable serious role to the film. Actually whenever the movie tried to go serious, it fell flat. Almost everyone else played an OTT role and for the main part did an alright job.
A big gripe was the lack of nudity in this one. There was one scene of boobs, and I think that was it. If they had a scene where they showed a full naked Ron Jeremy, the house would have come down. Shame. They kept the nudity to one chick and the fake alien weiner. Also, the gore is very minimal. Remember in the trailer where the guy gets split in half? That, and a couple sprays of blood is all I can remember. That was disappointing as well.
I had high hopes for this new entry into the subgenre of genital horror, but I was let down once again. The jokes and silly acting was abundant so you may laugh a bit, but it's just an average to below-average comedy. And as a horror, as it is a hor/com, it doesn't do well there either. The gore was weak, the nudity disappointing and the situations bland and cliché.
If you're easily pleased, and all you need is the idea of a killer penis to make you happy, you should be golden. But if you have experience with these types of movies, this is just more of the same. Just so you know where I stand with the above flicks that I mentioned, I enjoyed Killer Pussy (great nudity) and Teeth (bizarre dark humor) about equal, with this next and Bad Biology (tried way too hard to be funny) last.
