Tyrion Lannister: So... you roam the Seven Kingdoms collaring pickpockets and horse thieves and bring them here as eager recruits.
Yoren: Aye. Well, it's not all of 'em's done bad things. Some of 'em's just poor lads looking for steady feed. Some of 'em's highborn lads looking for glory.
Tyrion Lannister: Better chance of finding feed than glory.
Benjen Stark: [walks in] The Night's Watch is a joke to you, is it? Is that what we are, Lannister? An army of jesters in black?
Tyrion Lannister: You don't have enough men to be an army, and aside from Yoren here, none of you are particularly funny.
Benjen Stark: I hope we provided you with some good stories to tell when you're back in King's Landing. That's something to think about when you're drinking your wine down there, enjoying your brothels. Half the boys you've seen training will die north of the Wall. Might be a wildling's axe that gets them. Might be sickness. Might just be the cold. They die in pain... and they do it so plump little lords like you can enjoy their summer afternoons in peace and comfort.
Tyrion Lannister: [to Yoren] Do you think I'm plump?
[Yoren smiles and looks away]
Tyrion Lannister: Listen, Benjen - may I call you Benjen?
Benjen Stark: Call me what you like.
Tyrion Lannister: I'm not sure what I've done to offend you. I have great admiration for the Night's Watch. I have great admiration for you as First Ranger...
Benjen Stark: You know, my brother once told me that nothing someone says before the word "but" really counts.
Tyrion Lannister: But... I don't believe that giants and ghouls and white walkers are lurking beyond the Wall. I believe that the only difference between us and the wildlings is that when that Wall went up, our ancestors happened to live on the right side of it.
Benjen Stark: You're right. The wildlings are no different from us. A little rougher, maybe. But they're made of meat and bone. I know how to track 'em and I know how to kill 'em. It's not the wildlings giving me sleepless nights. You've never been north of the Wall, so don't tell me what's out there.
[Benjen turns to leave]
Yoren: You going below?
[Yoren and Benjen shake hands]
Yoren: Keep well, keep warm.
Benjen Stark: Enjoy the capital, brother.
Yoren: Oh, I always do.
[Benjen walks out]
Tyrion Lannister: I think he's starting to like me.
