Earthkiller

I watched this movie with no expectations and this lack of expectation was fully met by this movie which provided nothing of value. I would have given it zero stars but I could not go lower than one. The acting was not bad since it was nonexistent. The sets, well I skip them since the designer did. The story could have been told in five minutes by a gold plated android in an ewok village on a distant planet far, far away with more impact. The computer generated images (CGI) were bad - really bad. The only redeeming fact is they were short.

Who ever spent 1.5 million on this must have been looking for a tax write off.

And were did they skinny naked chick? Toxic Avenger please clean up this mess!

so this film starts off with a naked woman, wow right? everything going for a man is happy EXCEPT she's flat and whiter than the whitest Irish. Boom, happy moment gone. And what else, for the opening part of the film, nothing makes sense, literally, nothing does. Is this a Sci-Fi or what??? Nope this film is a piece of trash rubbish that was pooped out of a stupid D-graded writer who couldn't be arse to use his intelligence. Seriously, worst opening ever, didn't even bother watching after 20 minutes because nothing made any sense. Save yourself from this film, there are films that are rated lower than this film but makes absolutely more sense, save yourself and don't dare watch it, even if you're drunk - Just don't.

All I can say is ugh. This is an ugly movie visually -- bad lighting, bad script, bad acting, cheap sets and BEYOND bad special effects (both in practical and CGI category). The plot is non-existent so I won't even bother critiquing that. If the film has any value at all it would be to give the viewer the actual feel of watching a 70's sci-fi TV show like Dr. Who that had a minimal budget for sets and had painfully bad hand-made props made of spare plumbing and electrical parts. Te acting gives some camp value, except that the film takes itself dead-seriously. But even for that I doubt most people could tolerate sitting through 85 minutes of this turkey. I do not recommend.

This is a thematic film with fairly cardboard appearance but that is acted into the general scheme of things in a positive fashion. It has tongue in cheek humour all the way. I liked it a lot. A chaotic situation is occurring in space and little is known about why this is all going on from any outside sets or characters. However it all builds up the details to allow the plot to become very serious as a story. Definitely a stage on screen but I would say it passed that test admirably though will challenge you beyond forgiveness if you need sfx of a precise nature. I didn't really figure on the opposing sides being easy to understand, the zombies being zombies, extra creatures too. I think there was pandemonium and really I recommend to watch it, what else would there be if you were there.

Of the seven low-budget movies seen in the past six weeks(the previous six being Aliens vs Avatars, The Amazing Bulk, Thunderstorm: The Return of Thor, Captain Battle: Legacy War, Bonesetter and Star Quest: The Odyssey) Earthkiller, aka Total Retribution, was the best of them. It does have one redeeming quality which was that the idea was good, which the previous six did not have. That said, that is not saying very much because Earthkiller is still a terrible movie that doesn't do its concept any justice, one of those movies that starts off bad, not in a long time have I seen an opening scene this bizarre, and gets even worse as it wears on.

Earthkiller is very poorly made, almost like a failed student project, visually the best thing is the camera work, while it still often is dizzying there are glimpses of effort. Which is more than can be said for the lighting, which is at times too garish and others too dark(never appropriate), the cheap-looking sets which includes the most fake-looking space station you'll find anywhere in a movie and worst of all the truly appalling special effects, even the worst of SyFy and The Asylum have special effects as bad as here and they are on par with those of the aforementioned six movies. Earthkiller even incorporates blood and goes well overboard using it, even worse is that the blood doesn't even look like blood, instead looking like tomato ketchup that had been mixed with water.

The dialogue for Earthkiller is so awkward it'd be hard to stifle any laughter as well as cheese ridden, while the story is incredibly padded with nowhere near enough to sustain nearly an hour and a half and doesn't even try to make sense, there's nothing remotely clever or original about it with the movie ending on a confused note. The sound has a muddied distant quality where sometimes you have to strain for some of the dialogue and line delivery. The direction is flat, the characters are literally over-familiar walking clichés with no personality(they are actually annoying and the movie has the sense of forgetting to actually develop them) and the acting is practically non-existent. To conclude, a complete turkey despite having a good idea, a shame. 2/10 Bethany Cox