Nativity 3: Dude, Where's My Donkey?!

I had to sit through this dreck as I was staying at someone's house & they were sat in front of it like a potted plant. Not moving, not showing any visible signs of sentience but still watching it.

At one point she spoke up, "I think this is made for children."

At this point I lost my composure. "Made for children? It's made BY children and I hope they're ****ing orphans."

Absolutely terrible. Makes the original Nativity look like Citizen Cane. None of the characters are likable, the story makes absolutely zero sense and is, put simply, not entertaining. Do not subject yourself or your family to this abomination, and do not support the lazy cash grab that is this movie.

Nativity 3 very much scrapes the bottom of the yuletide barrel. Martin Clunes is the new teacher Jeremy Shepherd who along with his daughter Lauren is looking forward to getting married to his fiancée Sophie (Catherine Tate) in New York but he is also wary of her ex boyfriend, a famous singer who plans to do an impromptu flash mob for Sophie.

Mr Shepherd has to deal with Mr Poppy (Marc Wootton) the man-child classroom assistant who has recently been sacked by the new temporary head teacher in advance of the school inspection.

Mr Shepherd loses his memory after being kicked in the head by a donkey. Mr Poppy plans to take the school kids to New York by winning a flash mob contest in London and also hopes to get Me Shepherd's memory back so he can marry Sophie.

I think only the very young would like this dull film. School kids randomly start to sing and dance for no reason. The story is thin and grossly stupid. Mr Poppy should be locked up to protect the children and when the story moves to New York he inexplicably starts to behave like an adult.

As predicted, ten minutes in and I could take it no longer. And then I read the synopsis and was so glad I didn't bother. I've never been a huge fan of Clunes and having somehow suffered through Nativity 1&2, I am definitely not a fan of the jack@ss known as Mr Poppy. Finding out that it is a film about Martin losing his memory only made it clearer in my mind that I must never, ever watch this film.

It's a shame to see the gorgeous Adam Garcia involved. Looks like he'll do anything for money.

I can't score it, because I will NEVER finish it.

Where's My Donkey? Continues the festive fun with a delightful mix of humor and heart. This installment sees Mr. Maddens once again at the helm, as he prepares for the school's Christmas production. However, chaos ensues when his beloved donkey, who plays a crucial role in the nativity play, goes missing just days before the big performance.

As Mr. Maddens and his enthusiastic team of students embark on a frantic search for the missing donkey, the film unfolds into a charming adventure filled with quirky characters and comedic mishaps. The narrative cleverly intertwines the themes of friendship, community, and the importance of teamwork, all while maintaining the lighthearted spirit that fans of the series have come to love.

The vibrant cast adds depth to the story, with each character bringing their own unique flair to the challenges they face. The film is packed with catchy musical numbers and festive cheer, making it a perfect holiday viewing choice for families.

Nativity 3: Where's My Donkey? Is a delightful continuation of the Nativity franchise that captures the essence of the holiday season. With its engaging plot and heartwarming messages, it's sure to leave audiences smiling and filled with holiday spirit.