Random Distractions

I put together a post called Away from it all, close to home, yesterday. It appeared on the blog for a few hours and Val left a comment and I responded. Then, somehow it disappeared completely. I spent an hour or so reading all the help, advice and discussions on Blogger but I could not find any way to retrieve a lost post. Sorry, Val and sorry Dewena for your fruitless efforts. I'm going to write a little post now and hope this one stays put!

It has been a very lovely but also very busy summer.  We have had many visitors:19 in all but, I'm pleased to say, not all at once. The house has been filled with fun and laughter, a welcome distraction from the anxious waiting for my husband's test results. (Thank you for the messages and enquiries, it has taken a long time but the worst case scenario has now been ruled out but spinal surgery is required.)

Family members from Lancashire, Oxford and Bristol: brother, sister, nieces, great-nephews and a dog came to stay at various times as well as our son and his family and our daughter and hers. Happy chaos has reigned and the sun shone all the time! There have been barbecues and picnics, days on the beach, days on the burrows, hide-and-seek in the garden and a great deal of family time. It has all been wonderful but now I am exhausted!

My husband's doctor suggested we have a holiday while waiting for an appointment at the spinal clinic, which could be a long wait. He couldn't manage a long journey so I looked for some peace and quiet with a touch of luxury within a 25 mile radius of home and here we are in a farm cottage on the edge of Dartmoor. Apart from a young honeymooning couple, we have the whole farm to ourselves as the owners are themselves on holiday and the summer season is almost over. Tranquility is what we needed and that is just what we have. 

I posted a lot of photographs yesterday but I won't do that now in case they disappear again. As I have been typing this, a message that an error has occurred while saving has appeared at regular intervals. I will click on the Publish button and hope for the best. If this succeeds, I will try another full post later in the week.

Everything today seems to be high speed, top volume and low maintenance.  I admit that I was glad of many modern conveniences when I was a busy, working mother. Retirement means I have time to make real bread, real coffee, real porridge, to hang the washing on the line instead of putting it in the tumble dryer, to pick flowers for the house and generally surround myself with lovely tastes and smells. It really is worth the time and effort!

However busy I used to be, I would always lay the dining room table properly for our evening meal. Sitting down to eat together has always been an essential feature of our family life, a time to catch up on news, to sort out problems and to add to the repertoire of family jokes. The children have left home but they come to visit and the table has had to grow to accommodate the new family members but we can't imagine life without it.


My work used to take me into the homes of many young parents and I was at first surprised and then saddened to find that few of them owned a table. Lots of modern first-time houses are too small to have a separate dining room or even a kitchen/diner. People seem to eat from trays in front of the television - not a good scenario for encouraging language development in the deaf children I worked with! Deaf or hearing, children learn an enormous amount from the interaction of families and sitting in a row in front of a TV does not provide that. My husband, a maths teacher, wants a campaign to bring back multiplication tables; I want a campaign to bring back dinner tables!

My online friend, Dewena, takes great care over her table settings. Go over and see the lovely china and table linen she uses. We both think that it is worth the effort, even when we are left with only two at the table. I haven't asked, but I imagine she must have lots of cupboards to store all her china, something that I am sadly lacking. Our house is crammed with books and bookshelves and a china collection would be difficult to accommodate. 

I inherited an Edwardian teaset from my mother-in-law and it is still in a box, almost two years on. Inspired by Dewena, I took it out and washed it a few days ago. It is fine bone china, hand painted and heavily decorated:
There are 34 pieces altogether: 12 teaplates, 9 cups and saucers, 2 cake plates, a milk jug and a bowl. Mother-in-law, who inherited the set from her mother, kept it in a display cabinet and never used it. Afternoon tea parties went out of fashion in the 1940s and I don't have a display cabinet to show off that Edwardian splendour; what to do with it? I took the photographs to the local antique shop, which specialises in fine china, to get some idea of the value. I thought I might sell it and buy something I would like to use instead. I am glad that I took photos and not the box of china as I might have dropped it when I heard the valuation! £20 is the current value of this 110 year old set. There is no market for fine china.

What will I do? I will establish a new fashion for afternoon tea. I'll bake cakes and scones and make dainty cucumber sandwiches and lay the table with my best cloth and napkins and my fine china. You're invited!

Since last sitting at my desk, I have been travelling around Britain and generally having a good time. There has been a lot of cake:

April 1973

Hawk and Buckle April 2013

Swallow Falls 1973

Caernarvon Castle 1973

The MM and I were celebrating our 40th wedding anniversary. Our plan had been to have a quiet weekend away but our son and daughter had other plans and we were swept away in a whirl of gatherings, champagne, dinners and visits. After a weekend of fun here with the family, they packed us off to 

in North Wales to stay in the seventeenth century coaching inn where we spent the first few days of our honeymoon. The mountains, castles and coast looked the same and, as long as we avoided mirrors and shop windows, we imagined we were the same young people who went there in 1973!

I'm sure that everyone has a recipe for jam tarts but none can be as simple or as special as mine! I was baking with 4 year-old granddaughter Millie when she asked why I was using a recipe from a little notebook rather than one of the many cookery books I have on the shelf. I explained that I write up really special recipes in my notebook, which is well-thumbed and stained from years of use. She thought about this for a while and then asked if I would write her special recipe for jam tarts in my book and here it is, just as she dictated:

Millie's jam tarts

You need some pastry and some jam

Roll out the pastry
Cut out circles with a cutter
Put them in a special jam tart tray
Put some jam in each tart
Cook them
Take them out of the oven and let them cool
Eat them.
Simple, isn't it? Of course, this has pride of place in my notebook.

Wednesday has been the highlight of my week since the start of the writing course , led by my multi-gifted friend D of 60 Going On 16. Sadly, it  is drawing to a close.  I haven't enjoyed anything so much for a very long time and I hope that there will be more to follow.

One of the things that I've learned is that a simple word or phrase can trigger quite unexpected memories and associations, ideal stimuli for writing. One such exercise involved clothes and accessories; head down and no time to think, we rattled off as many as possible in a limited time. Reading them back, I found that I had marked milestones in my life with an item that I was wearing or had noticed on someone else. Everyone in the group was surprised to discover how significant clothes had been for us.

The bows that I remembered were the ribbons that my mother tied in our hair every day before taking us to school. Every day, my sister would come home with her plaits and ribbons intact and I would have lost one ribbon and my hair would be half plaited and half flying in an untidy mane. My poor mother became so frustrated that she cut my hair!

My earliest recollection was of a pair of buttoned leggings. I could not only visualise them but also recall their texture and the warmth and comfort they gave. I'm wearing them in this picture of my mother, sister and me arriving at the church for the wedding of one of my uncles.
I cannot possibly remember this occasion as it was before my second birthday and yet I have a strong sense of this sage green outfit, of having to sit still while the many buttons at the sides of the leggings  were done up and the black elastic straps wrapped around my shoes. Just over a year later, our baby sister was born and I suppose she inherited the little suit. Perhaps my memory is really of her little legs being buttoned into the leggings!

Are your milestones in life marked by the clothes you were wearing? Do share your stories.

She was more than a week late in arriving but she is lovely and the first member of the family to be born with a fine head of hair! Welcome to Elizabeth Orla.

The fourth grandbaby is due to be born on Friday. We are setting off tomorrow so that we can be on hand just in case the baby decides to put in a surprise appearance. We are renting a cottage in a village just outside Bristoland I rang the owner this morning to arrange to collect the keys. When I told her the purpose of our  visit she was stunned. Apparently the last four couples who have stayed in the cottage were  there to await the arrival of grandbabies! I am going to suggest that she asks each of us for a photograph of the babies so that she can make a feature of this unusual use  of her cottage.

Photos of baby and the village where we will be staying when I get back. I'll take my laptop but don't know if I will be able to get online. Just when I had started to catch up on my blog visits, too!

I arrived home today to find emails and comments on my last post that are both moving and encouraging. I also  had a message on my answering service informing me that a dearly loved cousin died this morning. All in all, a series of reminders of how important family and friends are and how lucky I have been to form such good friendships via the blog. So, I'm going to stop worrying that I don't have anything of great significance to share with the world and just carry on thinking aloud and being distracted by anything and everything.

Over the weekend we celebrated Brit Junior's second birthday. Intermittent showers did nothing to spoil the fun and games in her garden on Sunday. Then we went on to spend a few days with the other grandchildren. I can't show photos from the party as there are other children in them but I can show one that I took yesterday when Millie had her face painted. She chose the shark herself but she still looks surprised!
Thank you to everyone who left a comment or sent me an email. I'll be back tomorrow with a recipe even though I can hear my brother's sighs of dismay all the way from his Greek island!

The funeral of my mother-in-law, Dorothy, on Thursday brought together family members from Scotland and a wide range of places in England. At 94, she had outlived all of her friends but the presence of three generations of her descendants was an excellent demonstration of life going on.
All ten of her grandchildren, ranging in age from 40 down to 9 years of age, were present at the funeral and four of her eight great grandchildren joined us for lunch at a hotel afterwards. It was an excellent balance of solemnity and celebration.

Our children and grandchildren stayed on for a few days and the fun we had in the garden and on the beach dispelled any gloom that might have lingered.

Millie plays hide and seek but is soon found!

Three cousins explore together

Ben in deep conversation with the ornamental cat

And more to say to the meerkat

We had glorious sunshine on Friday and spent the day on the beach.

It's a great day for flying kites

Millie goes first

Her smile tells all

Sandcastles, of course

But fun can be exhausting

My mother-in-law has suffered a cerebral haemorrhage and is unconscious. We are told that she will not recover and members of the family are taking turns to watch beside her in her hospital room. As the days and nights pass, nothing changes visibly, she looks as if she is in a deep sleep and it is hard to believe that she will not open her eyes. But there have been significant changes in the atmosphere in the room and in the behaviour and attitude of those who come and go. The limbo state has been a blessing in disguise.


Limbo:  a place or state of oblivion
             an intermediate, transitional or midway place or state
             a region on the border of heaven and hell


Purgatory:  a place of expiation

Hearing: develops at around 8 weeks of gestation and is the last sense to go in unconscious patients




I'm sorry, there is nothing we can do but keep her comfortable 'til she slips away.
Her consciousness has gone, she cannot feel your touch
but that first sense developed in the womb goes on, deep in the sleeping brain
and she will hear your voice.
So speak to her of happy, long-past times,
recount her triumphs and adventures, her travels and her loves.
Forget the recent years of endless repetitions and mistakes,
make her a child again, winning her races, playing on the beach,
a beautiful young bride, accomplished hostess, gifted raconteur.
Roll back the years and let her dream of sunshine, vigour and romance.


This vigil is a healing time for all.
Her faithful carer, now a son again, returns to happier times and memories,
while those with lives too full to spend an hour in aged company
now sit beside her through the night, remorse transformed into a fantasy of duty done.
And those who found her difficult in life have time to reconcile their hurts.
This limbo has become a purgatory for all. And all will rest in peace when she is gone.

During the last six weeks I have attended three funerals and am now waiting for details of the funerals of two more friends. When I came to live here, 22 years ago, our little church on the hill was the centre of a small but thriving community. The church holds about 70 people and we had two services on Sundays in order to accommodate everyone. In the holiday season, the extra visitors would stand outside, crowding the area around the well.
Life has changed a lot in just a few years with fewer young people attending church or supporting village events.  Just ten years ago, I had between 20 and 30 children in my group and now not a single child comes to church. 


Our ageing population is dwindling. These latest deaths bring our regular congregation down to forty. The little parish is no longer viable and we have had to join with a larger one in a nearby town, with our beautiful little chapel being used only for weddings and funerals. I don't know if this is typical of village churches everywhere.


On a happier note, we were in Oxfordshire last weekend for our grandson's baptism. Benjamin was too big to wear the family christening gown, last worn by Millie but here he is looking very smart in his blue velvet suit:
And here he is with proud parents, godmothers and Fr Jamie in their bigger and, hopefully, more thriving parish church.

My daughter has just sent this picture of Millie in her beekeeping clothes and I just have to share it! The bees were left behind in London when the family moved to Oxfordshire but the garden has been prepared and the bees have come to join them. Millie is learning how to care for them.
She certainly looks the part!

We kept Millie and Ben busy and entertained on a wet and windy day last week by having a themed day. First we had the story of the Gingerbread Man
Then we made some gingerbread people of our own:


And put them in the oven to cook. Please note the pinafore that Millie is wearing, a lovely gift from Jodi of Curious Acorn:
When they were cooked, there was the difficult decision about whether or not to eat them:
But when you are three there is no time for misplaced sympathy for a cookie's feelings!
And Ben joined in too:
Here is the recipe for the gingerbread dough:
Ingredients
4 oz/8tbsp soft brown sugar
4oz/half cup soft butter
6oz/one and a half cups flour
few drops vanilla extract
2 tspn ground ginger
a little milk

Mix all ingredients except the milk (I used a hand held electric mixer but you could use a wooden spoon and the creaming method if you have stronger wrists!). Add sufficient milk to bind the mixture into a soft dough.
Roll out the dough and cut out shapes.
We used chopped raisins for eyes and buttons.

Place cookies on a baking tray and cook in a medium oven (190C/375F/Gas 5) for 10 to 15 minutes.
Leave to cool on a wire rack and gobble up before they run away.

After the clearing up, we played this game:
Wind and rain provide great opportunities for staying indoors and having fun!

I haven't been up to London to visit the Queen but I have been to see our very own Princess Amelia for her third birthday:

The Disney dress was very much appreciated

Not quite used to wearing a crown yet.

Birthday lunch with bambino-cino

But Ben prefers cucumber

Look, I'm a penguin

Party picnic with cousin Charlotte

Thye best way to party is to ignore your guests!

Seven days later it is Ben's first birthday. What a bore!

We can have fun together at the park now

Benjamin thinks he can scramble up the net now that he is 1

 We had a fun-packed birthday visit with parties, trips to the Cotswold Wildlife Park and the local park and countless other activities. Everyone was exhausted except the children!

I will be away for a while, celebrating the birthdays of two of the grandchildren: Amelia (Millie) will be 3 and Benjamin will be 1. I'm expecting a lot of fun but not much rest.  Back soon.
 

This isn't actually another post about bread - I'll save that for tomorrow. It's a bit of the real stuff. I know that boasting is not a pretty trait but what mother would not want to crow, just a teeny bit, when her son's profile is featured on the prestigious normblog?

The son is mine,  the rest is all his own. Congratulations, Brit!

My trip to Bristol to visit my lovely granddaughter, Charlotte, unexpectedly extended into a visit to Oxfordshire to babysit Millie and Benjamin. Having three grandchildren under the age of three keeps me busy in the nicest ways: I get to visit the zoo and parks and farms; read wonderful children's books, old favourites and some excellent new ones; find endless inspiration for knitting and sewing projects and get lots of cuddles.

The only downside to being a grandma is  exposure to the incredibly virulent colds that toddlers get when they are cutting teeth and both Charlotte and Benjamin shared their germs with me in a most generous fashion. By the time I drove home on Friday I had lost my voice completely and it still hasn't returned. The funny thing is that until I start to speak I don't know that I'm speechless! My voice ranges from strangled squeaks and whistles to the lowest register of Fenella Fielding's but in no predictable sequence! I can now empathise with teenage boys.

 There are some benefits though, as I sit on the sofa sipping my hot lemon and honey I am catching up on a lot of reading and I'm hoping to get back into a regular blogposting routine. Watch this space!

I didn't manage to get online at all while I was away but I did have my camera with me most of the time. I am gradually reading all the posts I have missed in my favourite places and I hope to catch up with everyone soon.

Where have I been? First to Oxfordshire to spend 5 days with my daughter and her family; then to the Peak District for a few days; on to York then a week in a cottage in the Yorkshire wolds. We saw parts of England we haven't visited before and our belief that England is the best place in the world has been reinforced!

 The family visit was, of course, about spending time with the grandchildren. Here is Benjamin, now 6 months old, wearing the sweater I made. And here is Millie wearing the tiger face that Grumpy made!
Abingdon is the nearby town and on the day we went in there was an Italian market in the market square:
We sampled (and bought!) lots of olive oils, vinegars, truffle pate and wonderful breads. The Town Crier put in an appearance and everyone joined in with his "God bless the Queen and God bless Abingdon!"
We assembled a picnic from the Italian goodies on display and headed for the river.
Millie wanted to swim with the cygnet but Grumpy rescued her
and she eventually joined us for the picnic. What fun it is being two and a half but how exhausting for grandmas and grumpies!

I couldn't resist the autumn/winter collection in the Abingdon stores and here is one of the winter coats I bought, although I will have to lose many inches before I can wear it
Tomorrow I'll be off to the Peak District.