Here we have a horror movie which sadly is much more laughable than scary. The characters are stupid. The story, not that there actually is much of a story, is stupid. There are no big scares to jolt you out of your seat. Really there's nothing to prevent you from yawning or flat-out dozing off. When the movie ended I was stunned to find out it was less than 90 minutes long. It seemed much longer. It honestly feels interminable. Please just let the killers put their victims out of their misery. Then we who have the misfortune to be watching can be put out of our misery as well.
So the setup is that a young couple, played by Scott Speedman and Liv Tyler, are spending the night in some house out in the middle of nowhere. There's a knock on the door. A really, really loud knock. That's about the most chilling thing the movie has to offer, a loud knock on the door. Anyhow our young couple ends up being terrorized by three people in goofy masks. Everyone involved, goofy mask people and their potential victims, acts very stupidly. Our victims have apparently never seen any horror movies as, rather than wait in the house with the freaking shotgun they have, they decide to go running around outside in the dark. Because running around in the dark always ends well in these situations, no? Our silly mask people are very lucky that their prey are so stupid because they are quite stupid themselves. If anyone involved in this story had any working brain cells the whole thing would've been over in five minutes. And what a blessed relief that would have been. Instead it goes on and on, Liv Tyler just keeps screaming and the would-be killers just keep, well, standing there. They never really do anything. Ooh, look a guy with a bag on his face is standing in the corner! Scary, right? Nope, not really. There is no action, no drama, no tension. It's all very predictable right from the beginning, probably not helped by the fact the movie basically gives away its ending right at the start. We go through all the horror movie clichés as the movie limps meekly towards a thoroughly unsatisfying end. Boring, unoriginal, quite stupid. That's The Strangers in a nutshell.
